God’s Authority vs the Husband’s Authority
As more and more people come to an understanding that the Torah still applies today, friction is not uncommon, even within the same household. A bigger question sometimes comes up, one about authority, headcoverings, etc. What happens if a husband and wife have different understandings regarding this topic? Should they get divorced?
The short answer is “No”, they should not get a divorce. When it comes to authority, the Word of God is the ultimate authority, above the wife, above the husband, above any pastor, teacher, etc. Remember, the order of authority begins with Yahweh, then goes to Yeshua, the Word, on to the husband, and finally to the wife. If the husband and wife differ in their view, such as the wife has begun to be obedient to Torah while the husband is not, the wife is responsible for herself to be obedient to the Word. The husband is still over her, but not when the direction he is leading is contrary to Torah. God is our authority, and a marriage is supposed to be a symbol of that. If the husband is teaching the wife to murder, to lie, and to steal she should not follow him in that direction. She should only be submitted to her husband in the way that is of God.
While she is not to follow him in a direction contrary to Torah, neither should she divorce him. We are given the grounds for divorce in the Torah, and it’s adultery not being married to someone who is not following Torah. What then should she do? The answer, according to Peter and Paul, even if the husband is not obedient to the Word, is she should be silent and not contentious, but rather a witness by her behavior (1 Peter 3, 1 Corinthians 7:10-17). Divorce is not an option in these circumstances.
YHWH is the ultimate authority, following Him is foremost. She can only be submitted to her husband in the way that is of God. If her husband is leading away from Yahweh, then she should not follow in that direction. By following Torah, being a light to her husband by her actions and with her prayers, it is possible she will lead her husband into the truth of Torah. Divorce is not the answer when a couple is unequally yoked in marriage with one seeking Torah and the other is not. The solution is to be a living witness walking out the Torah, following our Creator to the best of our ability.